Friday, August 25, 2006


I've long had a hate-hate relationship with sleep, shuteye, slumber, sommeil. It's been attributed to the nerves which run in my father's side of the family. Nerves= staying alert= caffeine buzz= tense muscles= tense brain= OMG it's already 7 AM it's SO LATE!

I don't really have a caffeine buzz anymore. I've cut down to ONE ESPRESSO A DAY. One Espresso! And to think I used to overdose on coffee like Africa was going out of business. I'm also careful not to have anything that contains caffeine after 5 or 6 PM.

It's a family curse, though I do have siblings that manage to snore their way through an entire morning WITHOUT FEELING GUILTY ABOUT IT.

My father wakes up at 5:30, my mother at 6:00. In camp, school and later in apartments, I was always the first one up. Countless hours were spent waiting for everyone else to catch up with me, after I had showered, cleaned the kitchen, finished 2 books and conquered a country.

I go to bed hoping to 'sleep in' the next morning, but it never happens. I refuse to touch sleeping pills. I did try them the summer I was 17, but they were probably placebos.
I don't sleep much, so the little slumber I get is PRECIOUS. Disturbers are roasted and eaten alive.

Because my nerves are always alert and at attention, I have a hard time FALLING ASLEEP. I can't sleep if there is light, noise, a faucet drip, a thick pillow, or if someone is whispering in India.
I wake up when people walk in. My body tenses and won't let go until the people walk out. Allow another 45 minutes for sleep to set in once again.

This sleep ordeal of mine is hard on other people. My poor husband must endure my biweekly whining: 'Could you PLEASE get up when your alarm rings? I automatically get up and out of bed and cannot fall asleep again while you continue to snore contently for another hour. LIFE IS NOT FAIR!'
It's not his fault. It's those frail nerves of mine.


Blogger Shoshana said...

You could have just described my life perfectly. Except without the husband part.

11:21 AM  

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